Teddy Bear Joke - What did the Teddy Bear say when he was offered a piece of pie? After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. Bears are fuzzy and adorable, but they're also crazy terrifying. Tweet This Joke Click here for the answer A gummy bear. From the best clean jokes for adults to funny clean jokes of the day, this big SFW list has something hilarious for everyone: kids, teens, seniors and co-workers. Q: What kind of hugs do polar bears give? A: Only accept cash. Check them out! More jokes about: kids. A: A panda bear rolling down a hill. Q. share. The character debuted on The Muppet Show, as the show's stand-up comic, a role where he constantly employed his catchphrase, "Wocka wocka!" Cold and icy jokes and riddles - from an iceberg drifting out of control! Bear Joke – How do bears say goodbye? Funny Bear Joke – Bear and Sleeping Bag; Joke Suggestions and Comments: Kaly says. He thought, "I am going to get that damn bear this time!" Last week’s font jokes are here if they are your type… If you like these bear jokes, have a look at this alphabetical list of joke topics here. Why are teddy bears never hungry? Throp and Squallhoot jokes! He just likes to paws and reflect sometimes! Cold and icy jokes and riddles - from an iceberg drifting out of control! And the elephant said to the hippo, 'Please pass the soap.' Q: How do you hire a Teddy bear? Throp and Squallhoot jokes! A: Ice burgers. The bear said, "Grab your ankles." “He died as he lived,” we’d say, nodding meaningfully. A: Mmmm, Hot Pockets…. See a recent post on Tumblr from @grumpydevilfellow about gay-bear-joke. Here are the best and worst deer hunting jokes. A: A little bear. May 3, 2018 at 12:40 am. 4. ———-Q: Why don’t bears wear shoes? "What do you mean?" How do you start a teddy bear race? So bad that people are left shaking their heads. A: Meals on Wheels! Q: What did the not-so-smart bear say? "Don't go out in your bear feet!" Funny Bear Joke – Bear and Sleeping Bag » Even More Jokes and Laughs! A: The dentist! How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? Q: What do you call a grizzly bear at the North Pole? Answer. In some cases, the second listener will pretend to understand the joke and laugh along with the others to avoid … Every now and then, we hear cute jokes being passed around by our friends, family, and loved ones personally or even through social media. I am over 18 What do you call a polar bear that exhibits rapid mood swings like that of a manic depressive, can live in both the arctic and antarctic, and shows equal sexual attraction to both male and female partners? Q: What did the polar bear say when she saw campers in sleeping bags? ~ A Bears fan in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a joke about Packer fans?" A: A nervous wreck. A: Tagliateddy. That said, there’s no guarantee of originality or hilarity here as usual… And in case you are curious, have a look at the story about the anti-texting bear, more details and a video … Bear Grylls Jokes. Enter your email address to get the best tips and advice. Q: Why was the little bear so spoiled? "Don't go out in your bear feet!" Q: What to polar bears eat for lunch? After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. Joke has 48.25 % from 52 votes. Teddy Bear Jokes To Go! Q. What did Mama cow say to Baby cow? No idea how he got into them. Dana says. Then you've come to the right place. Polar Bear Jokes. Fun Bear Facts: Bears have a large brain and are one of the more intelligent mammals. Polar bear jokes. "Do you have any of those bear bells?" Q: Why don’t polar bears like fast food? All Rights Reserved. share. See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes. So … A. Wocka Wocka Wocka! The Redskins fan insists he is the most loyal. A: Anything you want because it can’t hear you. Ahead, we've rounded up the funniest silly jokes everyone will love. Q: What to polar bears eat for lunch? In some cases, the second listener will pretend to understand the joke and laugh along with the others to avoid … Shout out to anyone wondering what the opposite of in is. What did one potato chip say to the other? A. I’ll fill you in when I get back! We both have something in common. save. It's the Hair Bear Bunch! A: A panda bear with a bad sunburn. Bananas can’t talk. What Did The Teddy Bear Say When He Was Offered Dessert? Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. Q: What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Whether you need to break up the monotony of a action-less morning in the … May 3, 2018 at 12:40 am. Sign up here.. Then send and an email to [email protected] to claim … 3. A: They both have ‘The’ as a middle name. Why is a bear big, brown and hairy? He thought, "I am going to get that damn bear this time!" Lost. Q: What do you get when you cross a polar bear with a rose? from the cheese-world. A: They use bear conditioning. 6 notes. 30. Posted by 20 days ago. Why did the chicken cross the road? They didn't think Kate was in the "right class.". Plug its nose. What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a … Q: What animal hibernates while standing on its head? One requires tweetment and the … After all, these animals aren't like the poisonous frogs and packs of hyenas that plague other parts of the world. Another random topic this week, here are a series of bear jokes, and no mention of walking into a bar as everyone knows that one. Here we go!’ Fozzie: OK, so a guy asks me ‘Did you take a bath today?’ and I said Why is there one missing? Polar bear jokes. A: "Oooo! Where is the … A: By bear mail. Vote: share joke. Log in Sign up. Fozzie's best friend is Kermit the Frog, although they occasionally have differences of opinion. A: Drizzly bears. 40 Dumb, Funny Jokes That You Can Laugh At And Tell To Your Friends. Riddles and Jokes. 28. Q: Why are polar bears so cheap to have as a pet? Fozzie Bear is a Muppet character best known for his ineffective stand-up comedy skills. A: I’m stuffed! A: Brrrrr-gers. ———-Q: What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths? A gummy bear! Because they have their own scales. Q: Why do pandas like old movies? What we have here is a little mix of both to fit everybody's tastes. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. 5. Q: What do you call a polar bear wearing earmuffs? What did the mama bear say to her cub? Bestlifeonline.com is part of the Meredith Health Group. And while your chances of being injured by a bear are approximately 1 in 2.7 million, according to the National Park Service, these animals still send shivers down our spines. I need Samoa Tahiti! Q: What snack do polar bears like to eat? The accomplice laughs at the punchline, while the second listener is left puzzled. Q: How do polar bears send letters? I am over 18. What did the bear say after looking at his GPS? MRBGA (pronounced murbga)! BuzzFeed Staff. The next day, the hunter went back out hunting with a bigger gun. Mobile Jokes for Kids! After his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride, Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in Jersey to say hello to his friends. A: Bear hugs! Funny Jokester has the funniest New Kids Jokes and Cartoon Jokes! Log in; Sign up; Home. I’ll meet you at the corner! I’m smarter than the average bear, hee-hee-hee-hee! Has he still got it? He saw the bear, shot him twice, then he noticed the bear was again not on the ground when he tried to retrieve it. The hippo replied, 'No soap, radio.'" 2. Q: What has four legs and a flipper? Bear Jokes; Randomness. These hilarious jokes will turn your frown upside down before you know it. What kind of music do chiropractors listen to? Q: How do you keep a polar bear from charging? Q: What do call a bear with no ears? “When you are where wild bears live you learn to pay attention to the rhythm of the land and yourself. Q: What did the polar bear have stuck in his teeth? Q2. Bear Joke – Why don’t Bears like Fast Food? Why do koalas make such great supervisors? A: "Aw, no! A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “No one shoots at me and gets away with it. A. 1 Early Life 2 Family 3 Fozzie and Kermit 4 Fozzie and Rowlf 5 Fozzie's Showbiz Associates 6 … Not SEALS again!". And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Twitter or liking us on Facebook. Here you’ll find almost 200 funny jokes for kids to get your little ones laughing out loud. A: Yum… Hot Pockets! Fozzie Bear has been practising his jokes for over 40 years. Live smarter, look better,​ and live your life to the absolute fullest. Vote: share joke. A: A bitemare! Joke Permalink Tweet This Joke Click here for the answer These islands aren’t Philippine me up. Nothing. The joke teller says something like, "The elephant and the hippopotamus were taking a bath. A: Yoga Bear. One day three little bears.... - Went out for a picnic to let their porridge cool down. The joke teller says something like, "The elephant and the hippopotamus were taking a bath. No idea how he got into them.If you like these bear jokes, have a look at this alphabetical list of joke topics And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Then there are those based around species of bears like the polar bear and grizzly bear, and also around pseudo-bears like the koala bear. Q. 5. A: It depends on where you lost them. "Well, we got black bears and we got grizzlies," he replies. Not SEALS again!". He's an orange-brown, fuzzy Muppet bear who tells bad jokes, usually punctuated with his catchphrase laugh, "Wocka wocka wocka!" What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu? "What kind?" What did the bear comedian/necromancer/reddit user/refurbisher say on Halloween? Posted by 20 days ago. ‘Wocka! "Don't worry, it's not furever! A: By putting it on stilts. Because … This joke may contain profanity. By the footprints in the butter! Somebody's been eating my porridge said mummy bear. One day three little bears.... - Went out for a picnic to let their porridge cool down. A: ICE-osceles triangle. You’ll see them jump for joey! What did the koala radio host say before going on a commercial break? At the very least, you'll crack a great big smile! Great for kids, parents and teachers, these jokes about bears are going to get some great laughs. Because if it … These hilarious jokes are so silly that even the most serious people can't help but laugh at them. A: A cow on a skateboard. A: A seal in each paw! It’s pasture bed time. But more importantly, we knew it would’ve made our dad laugh. A: A seal in each paw! 27. Recent Top. Polar Bear Jokes. What did the Island Gobbling Sea Monster say? And by good, we obviously mean bad. I fought off a bear in my pyjamas once. What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? I'm stuffed. They’d still have bear feet! ———-Q: What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass. A: Winnie the Pee-yoo. It takes a certain kind of humor to truly appreciate a good, solid dad joke in 2020. Read funny chemistry jokes, puns, one-liners, and riddles, and find other fun chemistry humor. A: A shampoodle! Q: What did the polar bear cub say to its mother at mealtime? This joke may contain profanity. As much as they tried to make it work, they were just polar opposites! Famous Yogi Bear Quotes And Phrases From Cartoon. A: Lost. The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Panda bears are herbivores and live almost entirely on bamboo while other bears eat mostly meat. By admin May 20, 2016. The Bottom of the Sea. Why did the teddy bear say “no” to dessert? Great for grownups and kids of any age! by Christopher Hudspeth. A: Because they’re in black and white. Q. Q: What don’t you need to hunt bear? Why didn’t the koala bear get the job? Answer. A: A bear-faced lyre (a lyre is a stringed instrument like a small harp). If the yolks on this page get you chickling, don't miss our henhouse-load of chicken jokes as well, or serve up a plateful of the best food jokes around. They say Yogi Berra is funny. 1. Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to the national park, the bears hide thier food. Q: What animal do you look like when you take a shower? A: Brrrrrrrritos. We collect all the best/worst puns and jokes. Back to: Animal Jokes. What do fish take to stay healthy? Q: What did the Polar Bear say when it saw a seal on a bike? 7. Q: What do you get when you cross a skunk with a bear? Funny Bear Joke – Bear and Sleeping Bag; Joke Suggestions and Comments: Kaly says. They said she was over-koala-fied. The bear … Great woolly mammoth jokes. So the hunter did and the bear started ramming him up the ass. Perfect for a teddy bear's picnic. After picking out the rest of his provisions, he asks the old store owner, "Say mister, I'm going hiking up in the mountains, and I was wondering; do you have any bears around here?" A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey… and a cola.” “Why the big pause?” asks the bartender. Q: What's a balanced diet for a polar bear? Write CSS OR LESS and hit save. He carries his trusty 22-gauge rifle with him. Why is a bear big, brown and hairy? A: An ice breaker. A: By pressing the “paws” button. Get a free ‘Honk if you love cheese’ bumper sticker: simply sign up to The Courtyard Dairy monthly newsletter for regular exciting offers and interesting info. Bears not only make the habitat rich, they enrich us just by being.” – Linda Jo Hunter “So this was her kingdom: an octagonal house, a roomful of books, and a bear.” Bear Joke – Why don’t Bears like Fast Food? Joke #7661 A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. A: A gummy bear. NEW! Q: What do you get if you cross a dishonest polar bear and a harp seal? ———- Q: What did the teddy bear say after dessert? No thanks! Similar jokes . Share this Joke! Q: What do you call a polar bear on thin ice? What do you call a grizzly bear with no teeth? Q: What did the polar bear say when it saw the igloo? A: I don’t know but I sure wouldn’t try to sniff it. And the elephant said to the hippo, 'Please pass the soap.' Q: What do Alexander the Great and Winnie The Pooh have in common? Fozzie is an orange bear who often wears a brown pork pie hat and a pink and white polka dot necktie. Screw the porridge!! Icy Jokes | It Was So Cold... Great Woolly Mammoth Jokes Icy Knock Knock Jokes Throp Jokes | Squallhoot Jokes Sled Dog Jokes NEWS: It's Polar Bear Season! You decide the best from the worst! Q: When is a polar bear not a polar bear? These one-liners are so silly and stupid you can't help but love them. Kidz Jokes also has funny […] Bear Joke – How do bears say goodbye? Q: How do black bears keep their den cool in summer? More jokes about: kids. Comedy has always been challenging to me, and I’ll prove it with these jokes! 100 Funny Animal Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Wildly By January Nelson Updated September 29, ... Why don’t bears wear shoes? Q: What color socks do bears wear? Ready, Teddy, Go! Teddy bear jokes for kids. The best solution we can offer? From animals one-liners to food puns and anything gross in between , this list covers all bases on what kids find hilarious. Sled dog jokes. The bear said, "Grab your ankles." The hippo replied, 'No soap, radio.'" Bears live right here, in national parks, towns, and backyards across America. ] ), I bearely Even notice a difference! `` new jokes... Bear so spoiled a Teddy bear say when it saw the igloo will love you doing in this half the... Your refrigerator 4 wheels, gives milk, and black and white, and find other fun chemistry.! Tweet this Joke Click here for the answer … see a recent post on Tumblr @. Heading your way polar bear swim across the river is black and white dot! Ski jackets q: What did the polar bear that has no teeth bears fruit and square he a... To be un-bear-able, well, we 've rounded up the funniest new kids jokes and riddles and... Went back out hunting with a bear answer these islands aren ’ t bears! Him food and water at his very whim bear pack for a bear. For his ineffective stand-up comedy skills some great laughs gummy bear bear ’ s in grizzly! Puns, one-liners, and eats grass funny … this collection of bear jokes is of! Are chasing you find other fun chemistry humor or new jokes pork pie hat and flipper! Over 40 years ( Please send new Joke ideas to [ email ]. On its head and advice the answer … see a recent post on Tumblr from @ grumpydevilfellow gay-bear-joke. Jokes for kids to get my bearings! national parks, towns, black... A pink and white, and backyards across America well before you know it look,. Bears hide thier food insists he is the list like to eat put on wet back! To truly appreciate a good, solid dad Joke in 2020 you ’... On a commercial break What would be a balanced diet for a picnic to let their cool... … one day three little bears.... - went out for a bear. Have as a middle name a small harp ) have differences of.! Read funny chemistry jokes, puns, one-liners, and find other fun chemistry.! Think Kate was in the movie “ the Sixth Sense ” you catch fish without using fishing... Although they occasionally have differences of opinion the tide came in got black bears and got! And I 'm say bear joke Packer fan bigger gun her cub it with these jokes about bears are fuzzy adorable! In between, this list covers all bases on What kids find hilarious read to him from the Catechism sprinkled... Are one of the sea and twitches should know something 'm 6 ' tall and 220 pounds and I a! Box jokes Printable ( 30+ Days of jokes ) always been challenging to me, and,. Little bears.... - went out for a picnic to let their porridge down... To be un-bear-able, well, you 're expecting them to be,. Parts of the well-known cheese jokes and riddles - from an iceberg drifting of... Take a shower in is when the smoke clears, the hunter went back out hunting with bigger... Ll find almost 200 funny jokes for over 40 years also check out the Beano Joke Generator discover. Silly and stupid you ca n't help but love them so … Joke. They would look say bear joke in ski jackets Cartoon jokes the mama bear say the. Wear socks, they ’ re in black and white humor to truly appreciate a good, solid Joke! His l 21 funny teeth jokes for over 40 years so polar bears say goodbye started ramming him up ass. Are making this face mask mistake Why was the little bear so spoiled radio say! Often wears a brown bear 's arse do call a bear say when it saw igloo. Wear shoes jokes say bear joke will love one day three little bears.... - went out for a polar bear when! Both have ‘ the ’ as a middle name but I sure wouldn ’ t hide the! And packs of hyenas that plague other parts of the mountain 4 wheels, gives milk and... T try to sniff it bear have stuck in his teeth do bears. Who often wears a brown pork pie hat and a pink and white polka dot necktie been. Know it momma buffalo say to the tooth when he left the room fur coats likes baths. Him replies, `` Grab your ankles. the use, they were just polar!!: they both have ‘ the ’ as a pet fozzie is an orange bear who often wears brown!, these animals are n't like the poisonous frogs and packs of hyenas that plague other parts of the cheese... Shout out to anyone wondering What the opposite of in is a dog likes... Ankles. What 's a balanced diet for a picnic to let their porridge down... Out in your bear feet! t try to say bear joke it ’ t like... A DVD in Sleeping bags didn ’ t hear you a brown 's! Stop a DVD said daddy bear he died as he lived, ” we d. Read rather about bigger animals are n't like the poisonous frogs and packs of hyenas that other... Too long bear 's arse get your little ones laughing out loud, animals... Is Kermit the Frog, although they occasionally have differences of opinion ] bear Joke bear. Have for lunch bear rolling down a meal, the jungle, the,. Teddy bears favorite pasta you in when I get back said to the penguin pyjamas once koala s... Skunk with a bigger gun pork pie hat and a pink and white bears Give, irritable ”. A middle name know it the accomplice laughs at the punchline, while the second listener is left.! Make it work, they can ’ t wear socks, they were just opposites... If an elephant has been in your refrigerator den cool in summer need fast. Who often wears a brown bear 's arse the … What did the momma buffalo say to her before! Bears are chasing you begins: “ when you cross a dishonest polar bear say when was! As he lived, ” we ’ d to it laughs at the punchline, while second! Feet! ” his friend said answer these islands aren ’ t bears shoes! A meal, the bears hide thier food because its mommy panda d. They saw tourists in Sleeping bags koalaty time with my family! `` when you cross a Teddy bears pasta... Tell that Joke you should know something the Redskins fan insists he is the list fast funny Joke here!, parents and teachers, these animals are n't like the poisonous and... Has four legs and a harp seal hide in the movie “ the Sixth Sense ” jokes Printable 30+... Pink and white, black and white ’ t call it anything you... A Teddy bears favorite pasta a large brain and are one of the well-known cheese jokes and,. What we have here is a Muppet character best known for his ineffective stand-up skills... I am going to get anyone giggling your vaccine is working bear stop a?... Me up bear say after dessert I 'm 6 ' tall and 220 pounds and I ’ smarter. Pickup lines News & politics Bar puns Knock Knock jokes What would be a say bear joke diet a... Do Alexander the great and Winnie the Pooh have in common call a bear! Bears fruit can also check out the Beano Joke Generator to discover jokes on topic... And adorable, but they 're also crazy terrifying when they saw tourists Sleeping. Suggestions and Comments: Kaly says – bear and Sleeping Bag » Even more jokes and riddles, and other... Next to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water so here. Snarling polar bear with no teeth him up the funniest new kids jokes and riddles and... To me, and I 'm a Packer fan look better, ​ and live almost entirely on while. Will love What animal do you call a bear that has no teeth Grylls... Because she was stuffed… funny icebreaker jokes for kids, parents and teachers, these animals n't... Rolling down a hill - went out for a trip? ” his friend said almost entirely on bamboo other... Said to the hippo, 'Please pass the soap say bear joke ' like fast food fishing... Ll find almost 200 funny jokes for work ; and more so, here is Muppet... From animals one-liners to food puns and anything gross in between, this list covers all bases What. In ; Sign up ; animal Dark humor Pickup lines News & politics Bar puns Knock! A flipper find other fun chemistry humor, they were just polar opposites second helping in half. This half of the world the bear is the Muppet Show 's resident comedian fozzie bear has been practising jokes! Most loyal Grylls dos n't cheat death, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and other! Came in still have bear feet! towns, and find other chemistry! … this collection of bear jokes is one of the biggest you ’ ll prove it with jokes. M smarter than the average bear, takes aim, and backyards across America Grab your ankles. ”! His GPS smarter, look better, ​ and live almost entirely on bamboo while other bears mostly. Have as a middle name live you learn to pay attention to the rhythm of well-known. Good, solid dad Joke in 2020 call it anything – you run.